Dancing through life

Down at the Ozdust...

If only because dust

Is what we come to...

Nothing matters

But knowing nothing matters

It's just life...

So keep dancing through...

Lyrics of "Dancing through life" quoted from the booklet of my "Wicked" CD

To be honest, sometimes I seem to others to be doing just that - dancing (though not dancing very gracefully for sure) or sleepwalking through life, seemingly ignorant of the problems. And sometimes I wish that were true.

In fact, there are times when it is true for me. I am good at putting my worries away when they get too huge. I can ignore them, concentrate on something else. But that's not the same as 'dancing through life' in that song. My worries always come back.

I'm a worrywart, sometimes. I worry about things I don't really have to worry about. Like what I would do if this or that happened (even though it's unlikely it will happen and I know I'm good at improvising). And I spent hours or even days worrying about those things. I could do better things with my time, really. I mean, between the new job, becoming a web-master, blogging (three blogs and my third isn't really ready currently, either), reading and writing (and I should sleep a few hours every day, too), I could really do with a few more hours spent productively - I'm not even mentioning the days here (oops...).

On the other hand, that worrying and thinking about solutions probably makes me such a good organizer. I'm trained in going through possible scenarios and their solutions at highest calculating speed. I just wish I could stop doing too much of it while it's not necessary.

On the other hand:

Blithe smile, lithe limb

She who's winsome, she wins him

Gold hair in a gentle curl

That's the girl he chose

And heaven knows

I'm not that girl...

Lyrics from "I'm not that girl" quoted from the booklet of my "Wicked" CD

I wouldn't want to be such a superficial girl (well, woman) either. I just will have to balance it out, the worrywart and the blind fool (actually a jester ignoring danger is the main motif of most "The Fool" tarot cards) dancing through life without looking at the consequences.

Do a little more dancing through life, at least metaphorically, and a little less worrying - sounds like a good plan to me. Or maybe I should put it more philosophical: I should learn to live in harmony with the Dao and flow through life like water through a river. Ah ... philosophy!